4 Swords - 12 Vesta Fire-Elemental

I meditated on "the void" this morning. Or rather, the void found me in my meditative state. It was powerfully frightening, to be suspended like that in what I experienced as a cold static. Into this strange mix, I encountered a singularly unpleasant "person". I put it in quotes, because "he" sort of appeared like a cartoon, almost. If "he" was human at all, "he" wore a mask of complete and utter hatred. When I saw this individual, I was physically in a state of in-between, and not really in control of my motor functions. It was like I was in some sort of psychic state of bondage, but my etheric arm reached out to the figure and tried to send him loving energy. He didn't want any of it, and when I tried to touch him, he brandished a knife.

Perhaps that wasn't a good idea, but I've had good luck in sending light and love to darkened creatures. It's happened with intention and spontaneously both. A psychic friend of mine told me years ago there's an entity that hangs around me, who is extremely pissed off that I seem to have been able to shake off a couple of my addictions. I have had a picture of him in the past as being sort of a Dr. Strange sort of fellow, though this guy reminded me of a cross between Bob Hoskins and Jack Elam, with a green bowler--sort of an evil leprechaun but not that tiny. I know that some people/entities are invested in their darknesses and it's none of my business. Perhaps this was a not-so-subtle reminder about that little wrinkle that could spoil a whole bunch of fantasies. I don't know. But I'm finding it interesting that I feel a sort of joyous calm as I type these words. There's something "mondo-beyondo" happening here, and while it's not altogether pleasant, I have to say there's something oddly peaceful about what I'm experiencing these days.

Interesting too, that today should connect Vesta with the Fire-Elemental ("that which is behind me"). A fire goddess and a fire creature together for the day. Just another interesting oddity.