3 Swords Hermes Wolf

Fuzzy thinking usually leads to that Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde sort of split that I've been reading about in ye olde sphere du oggly-bloggel-bloggens. One of the basic tools I learned how to use early on in my various recoveries was "think it through." Think through where trying to do something for someone that they can do for themselves would lead me. Think where the first drink would lead, where the first bite of a German chocolate cake would lead me. Where going to the bookstore when I don't have money would lead me. Knowing that these things give me an initial high that is followed by a crash of remorse and self-recrimination, I can make a different choice.

This sort of thinking things through is anathema to Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde, the presence of the absent-hearted reactors who need to knee-jerk demonize anyone who doesn't automatically sign on to their point of view. I used to feel scared of the bullies who spout "if you're not with me you're against me," but lately I've been finding them amusing. They remind me of those brainiacs who say "if you don't drink, I can't trust you." Which means they trust people who do drink, and how do you work that out, objectively speaking?

It's "objectivity"--becoming aware of what is and accepting it--that is THE enemy, which is why J/H types seem to be a bit more comfortable with the various versions of themselves that show up in all political stripes. The Pat Robertsons as well as the Larry Kramers. The David Kortens as well as the Milton Friedmans. The Andrea Dworkins as well as the Camille Paglias, etc.

Many people just aren't capable of nuance, of taking in the whole rather than focusing on the part. They remind me of the strange story of a practitioner of astrology that my own astrologer told me about, who said that where Virgo was in a person's chart was the most important thing to look at. More important than the sun, the moon, the ascendant? Wierde! (Weird+merde? I mistyped, but I kinda like it.)

I was thinking about this after seeing a headline on one of the local papers about some people pushing immigration reform. I thought, perhaps that is an issue I could use permaculture principles to explore, as I don't really have a huge emotional stake in it and I can see multiple points-of-view. I can see the point-of-view of the immigrants themselves, looking for a better life, just as I can see the point-of-view of people who have invested their lives in this hopeless system. I can see the grand victimization that is going on, and the seemingly urgent attempts to find scapegoats and fall guys, the desire to deny what is really going on--and denial is sometimes a friend, though it mostly appears to be a friend when it's really holding you up from facing necessary changes. There's a lot more going on with immigration than meets the eye, and there's a lot of exploitation of fears that lead to racialist bunkum that has nothing to do with anything, save for feeding some people's addiction to hate and rage.

There's flow, density, fuel and wisdom to be gleaned from taking the whole issue in and not settling for easy answers, for inviting ALL the parties to the table, even where there is distrust, and for bringing on those pesky emotions as partners to the whole affair. Decisions shouldn't be made solely based on feelings, but neither should they be entirely discounted, and when people feel disappointments at whatever compromises are honestly agreed upon, then those need also to be expressed. And if someone "loses" in the process, then something needs to be done to atone and to make up for the loss. We are all in service to each other, after all. (Non sequitur: Perhaps Donald Trump should start to do windows?)